THIS IS A FISHY REPORT

Hello from your old friend Bubba. If you've been to the farm lately and we haven't met, there's something the matter because even if you don't swim it's hard to miss me: I'm the biggest fish in the pond. As of late, my friends have been calling me "Big Bubba." All the young-ins both in and out of water wings have made friends with us fishes. Even if you don't swim, there's no need to be shy, we'll meet you halfway.

Well, no fish tale here, but this summer will be my 9th year on the farm. I'm headmaster of the pond school. On fair days, I lead the class on laps around the pond. On rainy days, we fish stay in and practice our arithmetic, reading and conjugation: such as swim, swam and swum. Then we break for lunch. When? Whenever you guys serve it! Thanks to you dear bed and breakfast guests, we are well fed; and for only a mere 25 per serving!

I admit, I do have a whale of a reputation when it comes to enjoying the fish kibble. The others are a bit shy when you extend your hand, but not me! Yes, I'll eat out of your hand, but no never off a hook! Don't you worry, even with my zesty appetite; your fingers are safe (I've got no teeth.) Now, don't try feeding that potbellied pig Nerd from your palm. If you haven't noticed, she doesn't exactly nibble – no, more like a ferocious snarf! Even Farmer Tom doesn't come too close when she has her nose in the feed trough.

And while we are digressing, what is it about this "filleting?" Every now and then when some of the dads lay eyes on me for the first time they crack up about some nice "fillets." I'd like some more info before I volunteer for that! And referring to me as a "fish fry" come now, don't you think I'm much, much larger than a minnow? I'd say I'm no small fry.

Now, just like you good people, I too did a little traveling last year. In my case it was more of an emergency trip. As it happened, some of the young-ins got too rough with their splashing. I was ambling along minding my own business and got thwacked. I tried to swim it off, but that nasty scratch on my nose was serious. Another fish got his fins painfully tussled. At that moment it was sink, sank, and sunk. The fish doctor (a rather nice ichthyologist) checked us into the hospital. Then he moved us to the small water garden for recovery.

During the month or so of convalescence, I made friends with the little boy who pees. Please nobody give him another glass of lemonade – he has had enough already! I also spent a bit of time listening to your conversations. I've learned about a thing called the "economy." How it all got so bad is a little over my head. However, I'm convinced to leave money things well enough alone. Maybe it was my tumble with the big boys that had me reeling, but I think you will agree that we all need a break now and then. I've chatted with the Olde Fogies and recommended they leave the overnight rates alone. They have agreed: no changes please. I hope you find that to be welcome news.

I hope to see you next year. Remember to avoid slathering on too much sunscreen/bug repellent stuff when you go swimming with my school (it makes our skin itchy.) And to the rough and tumbles: I may be the biggest fish in the pond, but I'm no shark. So easy goes it when you come to my pond.

Blub blub, Bubba

 

Hello Good People,
Every now and then when I overhear the kids protesting that it isn't really time to get out of the pond for Dutch Wonderland, dinner or beddie-bye, I find myself reminiscing about the good old days.

You see that really isn't Big Bubba's pond. Way back when Desireé was "Little Lizzie," that was her pond. She was in there splashing around even as the water was being put into the pond! Come summertime, flip-flops and a bathing suit was all she needed. The same was true for quite a few little ones who came every year. Anna, Sabrina, Rylene, and Matt, they were regular mermaids and mermen. They still visit, and Desireé still comes for a swim, but it's not the same. No standing still though – hey – this will be our 23rd year hosting B&B down on the farm! We can't wait to see how it will unfold.

So far though, this winter has been a doozy. There's ice on the ponds and snow piled everywhere – probably enough to last till June! I think we on the East Coast have really earned ourselves a nice, mild spring.

Yours naturally, Farmist Biz

P.S. I have sad news: Big Bubba no longer swims these waters. Mid spring 2010, the farm experienced a series of terrible floods. Several inches of soil and corn stalks were washed into the pond creating a terrible mess. Although the pond has since recovered, a number of fish including Big Bubba were lost. We miss them very much. — Biz

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